Lots of Tory party members were sent two ballot papers to vote in the coming Tory leadership election. Tory party leaders (not to be confused with Tory party leadership challengers) told members not to vote twice. The two papers were sent out due to incompetent record-keeping, inefficient management and a desire to make the vote […]
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In his Independence Day speech, US President Donald Trump paid tribute to the actions of George Washington’s Continental Army for infiltrating and blowing up the alien mother ship. He commended the courage of US President George Washington who was prepared to sacrifice his own life in order to nuke the ship. “They don’t make Presidents […]
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Bringing up the rear in the Tory leadership race, Jeremy Hunt is hoping an appeal to traditional Tory right-wing values and nostalgia for the ‘good old days’ will win him favour with the Tory voters. He has pledged to restore lost cultural and heritage values by taking the country back to the days of the […]
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The UK’s Combined United National Team Sports committee oversees rule changes in all sports played in the UK. The committee has received several complaints of unfairness from players in many different sports. This has led the committee to impose several rule changes to create a ‘level playing field’ for all participants. Rugby Players will only […]
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NHS management to levy a £1-per-minute fine on patients. Ostensibly this is to encourage patients to arrive on time but privately, some management staff admitted it was to boost the NHS’s budget. Mrs Dot Brimstone, 56, attends her local hospital on a weekly basis and said: “Blimey! If I’m late it’s because the bus was […]
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Feature by guest reporter David Layzelle Although out of the Tory leadership race, Michael Gove put himself back in the political spotlight by revealing his passion for tiny shoes. His Cabinet colleagues decried the move as showboating and suggested the party whip bring him to heel and make him toe the line. But Mr Gove […]
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Like to come home after a hard day at the office and relax in front of a soap? Think again. Researchers at the TV Intellectual Transcription Service say watching EastEnders causes more stress than a day at the office. The company analysed results from over 57 volunteers who worked in offices and who were also […]
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As Tory leadership hopefuls, Boris Johnson and Jeremy Hunt, vie for position in the race, both have pledged tax reforms that will see the UK go bankrupt within a month, according to the Financial University’s Creative Knowledge department. Boris Johnson‘s tack is to deliver swingeing tax cuts for the well off, the rich, the very […]
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