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Paedophile ring smashed – Pied Piper arrested

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

To mark April Fools’ Day, in Hungary hundreds of people took part in a “silly walks” parade. In the UK, millions of people watched fools cocking up another Brexit vote!

Killer car seats have been sold online for £8. Tennessee is considering them as alterantive to the electric chair

The world’s first AI politician can sidestep questions on any issue from policing to climate change, and poverty to taxation. However, the developers have so far been unable to incorporate the essential lying, expense-fiddling and back-stabbing routines

“Walls work!” says Donald Trump. “Mine doesn’t!” said Bobby “Bubba” Brandon of Texas. “It doesn’t even keep out the damn Mexican kids next door!”

During her visit to China UK PM, Theresa May, said she wanted to “intensify the golden era of UK/China relations”. Bejing said if that’s what she wanted, they were quite ready for another Boxer Rebellion

Corruption allegations made against Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. “It’s anti-semitic!” he claims. #Anti-semitismFail

Nigerian Presidential elections halted in last-minute drama – someone actually replied to the Prince’s Nigerian scan email!

Gollum diagnosed with shiny object syndrome

Thousands of criminals to be tracked by GPS. “And if that works,” said a UK government spokesperson. “We’ll be rolling it out as compulsory for everyone else.”

Stan Lee lives! Doctors say: “It’s a Marvel!”

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos agrees $35bn divorce settlement. His affair with Fox TV host Lauren Sánchez officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the most expensive f*@k in history!

Trump’s “witch hunt” successful! 27 witches arrested. Salem on lockdown

Saturday Night Live Improv star arrested in bizzare recipe squabble. A police spokesman said: “You couldn’t make it up!”

James Corden whinges and complains’chubby’ actors are shut out of romantic roles. #MeTooFat

21, June 2019

Trump’s 2020 slogan: “Make America Fascist Again”

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Trump's new slogan for his 2020 presidential re-election bid reflects current American values

Trump’s new slogan for his 2020 presidential re-election bid reflects current American values

Current US President Donald Trump has kicked off his 2020 presidential re-election bid with a new slogan and a new hat.

He has swapped his familiar red cap for a new one bearing the words “Make America Fascist Again.”

It is being produced and sold under license to fund his burger habit and contribute to his Mexican Wall fund.

Trump supporters are buying up the hats faster than they buy McDonald’s and KFC.

However, a survey by American Research Survey Expedia revealed that 95% of Trump supporters don’t know what ‘fascist’ means.

The majority thought it was an up-market term for people who are good at fashion. They wear their caps proudly with their fashionable dungarees and kneepads.

The ones who admitted not knowing said they didn’t care what it meant as long as it was a ‘Trumpism’.

A White House aide who spoke off the record said Trump always intended to appeal to the mass uneducated and ill-informed which is how he won the last election. This new slogan appeals to both. Whatever they think it means.

An official White House spokesperson said: “President Donald Trump’s new slogan reflects the values that we Americans hold dear. It expresses his belief that under his continued governance America will, once again, become the greatest country in the world.”

The caps are made in China.

Ref: BBC News What does this hat mean to Americans?


Can you think of a better slogan for Trump’s hat?
Will Trump win in 2020?
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