To mark April Fools’ Day, in Hungary hundreds of people took part in a “silly walks” parade. In the UK, millions of people watched fools cocking up another Brexit vote!

Thousands of criminals to be tracked by GPS. “And if that works,” said a UK government spokesperson. “We’ll be rolling it out as compulsory for everyone else.”

Facebook data leak accidentally reveals identity of the unknown soldier

Paedophile ring smashed – Pied Piper arrested

Gollum diagnosed with shiny object syndrome

James Corden whinges and complains’chubby’ actors are shut out of romantic roles. #MeTooFat

Nigerian Presidential elections halted in last-minute drama – someone actually replied to the Prince’s Nigerian scan email!

Trump’s “witch hunt” successful! 27 witches arrested. Salem on lockdown

Killer car seats have been sold online for £8. Tennessee is considering them as alterantive to the electric chair

The world’s first AI politician can sidestep questions on any issue from policing to climate change, and poverty to taxation. However, the developers have so far been unable to incorporate the essential lying, expense-fiddling and back-stabbing routines

Corruption allegations made against Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. “It’s anti-semitic!” he claims. #Anti-semitismFail

Stan Lee lives! Doctors say: “It’s a Marvel!”

Saturday Night Live Improv star arrested in bizzare recipe squabble. A police spokesman said: “You couldn’t make it up!”

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

“Walls work!” says Donald Trump. “Mine doesn’t!” said Bobby “Bubba” Brandon of Texas. “It doesn’t even keep out the damn Mexican kids next door!”

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos agrees $35bn divorce settlement. His affair with Fox TV host Lauren Sánchez officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the most expensive f*@k in history!

During her visit to China UK PM, Theresa May, said she wanted to “intensify the golden era of UK/China relations”. Bejing said if that’s what she wanted, they were quite ready for another Boxer Rebellion

Tag Archives for " USA "

6, March 2019

Facebook crackdown on false Reactions. New rules to force users to prove their Reactions genuine

You Like it! Really? Prove it!

In a crackdown against fake news, fake buns and false everything else, Facebook is introducing compulsory ‘Reaction proof’. Before a user can select Like, Heart or one of the other Reaction emoticons, they will have to prove their intent is genuine. A Facebook spokesperson explained: “Facebook has been accused of promoting false messages and fake […]

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Dogs will rule the world by 2050 as they get smarter and humans get dumber!

Dogs will rule the world by 2050!

Esteemed psychologist and dog behaviourist, Dr Stanley Coren PhD., DSc, FRSC, who specialises in testing dogs’ IQ, says that dogs are definitely getting smarter. When he first began his doggy IQ tests back in the 1990s, dogs were as smart as the average two-year old. “Now,” says Dr Coren. “Dogs are as smart as a […]

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Oil companies release “Energy from water” patents they’ve sat on for years! “It’s a major boon for the whole world,” they say. “But mainly for us!”

Gives a new meaning to the phrase:

In a joint statement put out by the World’s five biggest oil companies, they have agreed to release “energy from water” patents that they have held for over 50 years. The patents describe how water can be converted to energy and used to “fuel” every kind of engine from cars to planes, and from boats […]

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17, February 2019

Dog with the rudest name in the world is Shih Tzu! – says Guinness Book of Records

We love this little Shitty Ass Fokker

A Shih Tzu dog called Shitty Ass has been named the dog with the rudest name in the world by the Guinness Book of Records. It’s official! The dog’s owners, Buck and Bella-Ellen Fokker from Arkansas said: “We didn’t know nothing about it. Our good neighbour sent the name to the Guinness Book of Records […]

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Donald Trump commissioned study to prove men with small hands have big penises

Donald Trump shows off his small hands. Fortunately, that's all he showed off

A study commissioned by Donald Trump to prove men with small hands have big penises has been running for over two years without reaching a publishable conclusion. One of the analysts involved in the study, who declined to be named, said: “The fact is, hand size has no relation to penis size and small hands […]

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“Dinosaurs became extinct because they nuked each other!” claims evolutionary scientist. “And we’re next!”

Dinosaurs used their opposable thumbs to nuke each other!

“It’s the thumbs, you see,” said Dr Richard Gould, lead researcher into Opposable Thumb Evolution. “Not many species have opposable thumbs, mainly humans and primates. But dinosaurs like the Tyrannosaurus Rex had them. 65 million years ago they used their opposable thumbs to develop weapons of mass destruction and wiped each other out. History is […]

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