Stan Lee lives! Doctors say: “It’s a Marvel!”

James Corden whinges and complains’chubby’ actors are shut out of romantic roles. #MeTooFat

Facebook data leak accidentally reveals identity of the unknown soldier

Nigerian Presidential elections halted in last-minute drama – someone actually replied to the Prince’s Nigerian scan email!

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos agrees $35bn divorce settlement. His affair with Fox TV host Lauren Sánchez officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the most expensive f*@k in history!

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

Saturday Night Live Improv star arrested in bizzare recipe squabble. A police spokesman said: “You couldn’t make it up!”

During her visit to China UK PM, Theresa May, said she wanted to “intensify the golden era of UK/China relations”. Bejing said if that’s what she wanted, they were quite ready for another Boxer Rebellion

Thousands of criminals to be tracked by GPS. “And if that works,” said a UK government spokesperson. “We’ll be rolling it out as compulsory for everyone else.”

Killer car seats have been sold online for £8. Tennessee is considering them as alterantive to the electric chair

Corruption allegations made against Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. “It’s anti-semitic!” he claims. #Anti-semitismFail

Trump’s “witch hunt” successful! 27 witches arrested. Salem on lockdown

“Walls work!” says Donald Trump. “Mine doesn’t!” said Bobby “Bubba” Brandon of Texas. “It doesn’t even keep out the damn Mexican kids next door!”

To mark April Fools’ Day, in Hungary hundreds of people took part in a “silly walks” parade. In the UK, millions of people watched fools cocking up another Brexit vote!

Gollum diagnosed with shiny object syndrome

Paedophile ring smashed – Pied Piper arrested

The world’s first AI politician can sidestep questions on any issue from policing to climate change, and poverty to taxation. However, the developers have so far been unable to incorporate the essential lying, expense-fiddling and back-stabbing routines

Tag Archives for " Business "

New BBC policy to challenge politicians’ veracity

Andrew Neil prepares divisive questions for the next hapless politician to guest on the BBC's new News program:

Feature by guest reporter David Layzelle Following criticism of its stance on party politics, Brexit, and the Trump administration, the BBC has announced a new interview policy. BBC Chairman, Lord Tony Hall, issued an edict stating that every statement made by a politician should be questioned for authenticity. With the BBC Royal Charter, and his […]

Tell me more...!

Zuckerberg’s lunch money seized after Facebook data scandal

Mark Zuckerberg pleads with the FTC not to seize his lunch money as it's all that's standing between him and a slap up lunch at the Ritz

The FTC (Federal Trade Commission) has ordered Mark Zuckerberg‘s lunch allowance to be seized following allegations that Facebook has been gathering data on its users. Data the company gathered includes users’ friends and family, where they live, where they went to school, the name of their pet and their favourite swear word. In many cases […]

Tell me more...!

NHS to fine patients late for appointments to boost flagging coffers

NHS queues stretch around the playing field. No one wants to be late for their appointment. The doctors will be arriving in a few hours

NHS management to levy a £1-per-minute fine on patients. Ostensibly this is to encourage patients to arrive on time but privately, some management staff admitted it was to boost the NHS’s budget. Mrs Dot Brimstone, 56, attends her local hospital on a weekly basis and said: “Blimey! If I’m late it’s because the bus was […]

Tell me more...!

‘Fixers’ send victims take-aways from dirty restaurants as warnings

Strong arm men who threaten people who owe their bosses money have a new method of intimidation. They send them a delivery from a dirty take-away restaurant. In most cases the aim is to intimidate rather than permanently main or kill. Otherwise how would they repay what they owe? Using a third-party company like a […]

Tell me more...!

Labour calls for nationalisation of BBC

Gary Lineker was once a famous footballer but now he has to scrape a living working for the BBC

The BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation) is in dire straits. Its management team is struggling to pay themselves their pitiful salaries and keep the BBC running at its current level of inefficiency. “The presenters want sooooo much money,” moaned head honcho, director general Tony Hall, who is, understandably, finding it difficult to manage on his meagre […]

Tell me more...!

Mountain Air scam: Bottled ‘Mountain Air’ not bottled in mountains

Does your bottled air come from the mountains or Dagenham? Can you really, really tell?

A company has been accused of making millions of pounds from gullible consumers by selling bottled ‘mountain air’ that is no better than the air they can get for free. An investigation has revealed that the Mountain Air Company has been scamming customers by selling air that was not bottled in the mountains. In a […]

Tell me more...!
1 2 3 6