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People flock to Wetherspoon pubs to be insulted. “I never tell my staff to be nice to customers,” said Tim Martin, chairman

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Don't upset the staff at Wetherspoons! The barmaids are real knockouts!

Don’t upset the staff at Wetherspoons! The barmaids are real knockouts!

People are queuing up to get into Wetherspoon pubs after chairman and Brexiteer Tim Martin released a statement saying he never tells his staff to be nice to customers.

Instead of the cheery “What can I get for you?” English pubs are renowned for, Wetherspoon staff are treating customers with the disdain they deserve. As one staff member, who declined to be named, said: “You come into a shitty pub with shitty staff and shitty food, what do you expect?”

At a visit to a local Wetherspoons yesterday, the most polite request I heard was “Yeah, what do you want, wanker?”

American tourists seem particularly keen to experience the “true British pub atmosphere”. Visitors Tom and Betty Hernandez from Austin, Texas said: “It’s all so quaint. It’s so refreshing to be shouted at and insulted. We’re really tired of the ‘Have a good day’ mentality we experience in the U.S. of A.”

Tom, 57, added: “And the food here is so bad – unimaginative, uninspired and inedible is how I’d describe it. We probably wouldn’t feed it to our hogs back home, but it is cheap!

“I love the way the servers throw it at you, too,” said Betty, 54. “You really do get tired of polite service all day and every day.”

“And when we gave them a tip,” said Tom. “They took our money and told us it wasn’t their fault they were understaffed and the food was shit. Then they escorted us to the door.”

“Such charming traditions,” added Betty. “I can’t wait to tell the folks back home, they simply won’t believe us.”

A spokesperson for Wetherspoons said: “It’s cheap, our staff are shite, what do you want? If you don’t like it just fuck off!”

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