Corruption allegations made against Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. “It’s anti-semitic!” he claims. #Anti-semitismFail

“Walls work!” says Donald Trump. “Mine doesn’t!” said Bobby “Bubba” Brandon of Texan. “It doesn’t even keep out the damn Mexican kids next door!”

Gollum diagnosed with shiny object syndrome

The world’s first AI politician can sidestep questions on any issue from policing to climate change, and poverty to taxation. However, the developers have so far been unable to incorporate the essential lying, expense-fiddling and back-stabbing routines

Stan Lee lives! Doctors say: “It’s a Marvel!”

Trump’s “witch hunt” successful! 27 witches arrested. Salem on lockdown

Thousands of criminals to be tracked by GPS. “And if that works,” said a UK government spokesperson. “We’ll be rolling it out as compulsory for everyone else.”

To mark April Fools’ Day, in Hungary hundreds of people took part in a “silly walks” parade. In the UK, millions of people watched fools cocking up another Brexit vote!

Saturday Night Live Improv star arrested in bizzare recipe squabble. A police spokesman said: “You couldn’t make it up!”

Killer car seats have been sold online for £8. Tennessee is considering them as alterantive to the electric chair

James Corden whinges and complains’chubby’ actors are shut out of romantic roles. #MeTooFat

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

Facebook data leak accidentally reveals identity of the unknown soldier

During her visit to China UK PM, Thereas May, said she wanted to “intensify the golden era of UK/China relations”. Bejing said if that’s what she wanted, they were quite ready for another Boxer Rebellion

Paedophile ring smashed – Pied Piper arrested

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos agrees $35bn divorce settlement. His affair with Fox TV host Lauren Sánchez officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the most expensive f*@k in history!

Nigerian Presidential elections halted in last-minute drama – someone actually replied to the Prince’s Nigerian scan email!

7, June 2019

Oz cops bug Roos to spy on citizens

You are awesome for sharing

"...And when you get a bit older, son, Scott Morrison will come along and invite you to join his private army of spies."

“…And when you get a bit older, son, Scott Morrison will come along and invite you to join his private army of spies.”

An increasing number of right-wing governments across the world seek to curtail freedom of speech and freedom of the press. This has lead to several imaginative ways of spying on the country’s citizens and journalists.

One of the latest comes from Australia’s right-wing and religious zealot Prime Minister, Scott Morrison. The more power he gets the more right wing he becomes.

He ordered a crackdown on journalists and broadcasters after he was caught with his hand in the cookie jar when he failed to pay his share of the community ‘tea fund’ for 12 consecutive months.

The police have been enforcing search warrants to look for the whistleblower. They are concentrating their search on tea ladies and the IT department.

Morrison was also unhappy about allegations in the press that although he is against same-sex marriage, he is not against gays. He obviously took the reports to mean one thing when they meant another, and he has had it in for the press ever since. So to speak.

Morrison also wants to instigate methods of spying on Australian citizens so he can finger dissenters and send them to the gulag.

His latest ruse is to plant bugs in kangaroos and train them to sidle up to tourists. They will also record journalists when they have secret conversations in the outback. He also hopes this will stop the Aborigines asking for some of their land back.

His second set of spy bugs will be placed in ash trays sited in public smoking places. This assumes smokers are more likely to be plotters and dissenters rather than nicotine-dependents.

The police presented a search warrant to one of Australia’s leading newspapers allegedly to look for the source of the stories. Insider information reports that the police spent most of their time reading the back catalogue of cartoons poking fun at Morrison.

The warrant gives the police the power to delete and add to the files. Some were seen drawing moustaches on Morrison while others deleted cartoons they said were ‘not funny’. So now they are the humour police, too.

The cases continue as Morrison ramps up his army of Roos and promotes his interest in tobacco companies

Ref: BBC News ABC raid: Outcry as Australian police search public broadcaster

Which makes the better spy – Kangaroos or Koalas?
Where is your favourite place to plant a bug?
Leave a Comment below

You are awesome for sharing

Click Here to Leave a Comment Below

Leave a Reply: