Newton’s Law that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction has been discovered to apply to Facebook Reactions such as Like, Heart and the smiley emoticons.
Every time you respond to a post with an Angry emoticon, somewhere else someone posts a photo of a puppy in a bow tie sitting in a basket.
Likewise, every time you Heart a post, someone on the other side of the world punches a kitten in the face! (They don’t always upload this to their Timeline.)
The other Reactions have similar, opposite effects. This is what we know so far:
Like: A child is forced to eat broccoli.
Haha: A clown sheds a tear.
Wow: Someone has a really boring day.
Sad: A banker or CEO gets another pay rise.
A Facebook spokesperson said: “While our god and father, Mr Zuckerberg (all praises to Him our saviour) did tell Congress that Facebook is responsible for what its users post online, he did have his fingers crossed at the time so it doesn’t count.
“But nowhere except in the dim, dark recesses of a politician’s mind can we be held accountable for Newton’s Third Law of Motion. Even Newton himself had no control over that. But that’s politicians for you – always wanting to blame someone else.
“Excuse me while I comment on this post with a big…” <kerching!>