Hotel California – guests check out and leave! One said: “The pink champagne was a nice surprise and the band was good but the guitar solo did go on a bit…”

Movie business to make a movie about the business of making a movie in the movie business

Government crackdown on unregistered protests has lead to an increase in unregistered protests

Government passes Deferred Gratification bill. It comes into effect in 2050

Catalytic converters stolen for precious metals. Police search for culprits was exhautive… But plans to prosecute dealers receiving the metal have been scrapped

In a bid to tackle herd mentality, Facebook bans mental patients with hearing difficulties

How to spot a fashion rip-off – the original garment costs ten times what it’s worth!

Prolific Facebook “Liker” Simon Miles ordered to stop Liking everything – he doesn’t Like it.

A vandal broke into the Tate Gallery and made up Tracy Emin’s “My Bed”. Police are looking for a criminal who’s had a good night’s sleep

Thieves broke into Battersea Dogs Home. No animals were taken but police are looking for leads. A spokesman for Battersea said: “They’re barking up the wrong tree.”

James Pattison to stop collaborating with co-authors. His next solo book is due out in2035

Turner Old Master found in rubble: Ex-teacher Brian Turner doing well after his ordeal

Donald Trump urges Europe to repatriate IS fighters – and shoot them!

Birmingham bin workers strike over ‘poor equipment’ claims. A council spokesman said: “That’s absolute rubbish!”

You CAN die laughing – although not at a Michael McIntye show

“Salsa is supposed to keep you fit,” said Roscoe Arbuckle. “But I ate 5 bottles a day and I haven’t lost an ounce!”

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

Narcissus updates Faccebook relationship status to “Me”. Zuckerberg updates his status to “God”

Remake of Hitchcock’s The Birds being backed by vulture capitalists

21, September 2019

McDonald’s pioneer save the planet Go Small meals

You are awesome for sharing

McDonald's super healthy, save the planet Go Small meal

McDonald’s super healthy, save the planet Go Small meal

In a bid to get us to eat less and save the planet, the Ministry for Food and Conspicuous Consumption is urging everyone to eat smaller portions of food, both at home and in restaurants.

McDonald’s was one of the first companies to take this on board in a variation on its Supersize Me campaign. This was reputedly responsible for over 73% of obesity in the USA and over 91% in Ashington in the UK.

Now McDonald’s is urging customers to Go Small.

INTERIOR: Ubiquitous McDonald’s. The CASHIER is in his 30s, intelligent and chatty. This is the first job he’s been able to get since graduating with a Doctorate in Business Management from Teesside University eight years ago.

CUSTOMER: Big Mac, fries and coke, please.

CASHIER: Certainly. Would you like to Go Small?


CASHIER: Yes, it’s our very healthy option which also saves the planet.


CASHIER: Great choice. So that’s a small burger at another 70p. Shall we take off the cheese? Only an extra 50p.

CUSTOMER: Cheese? Oh, all right.

CASHIER: Excellent. Actually we have a Go Small special on today whereby we can substitute the burger entirely for the tomato.

CUSTOMER: Substitute the tomato for the burger?

CASHIER: I thought you would, just another 97p. And would you like us to remove the salad?

CUSTOMER: I guess so.

CASHIER: Great choice. That’s an additional 65p. And would you also like us to hold those starchy buns?

CUSTOMER: I guess.

CASHIER: Excellent choice. That’s only another 85p. We can also make the meal super-healthy by serving small fires or cutting them out altogether. Shall we cut them out for you?

CUSTOMER: Oh, all right, no fries.

CASHIER: Great choice. That’s another £1.20. And perhaps we can top off your delicious meal with McDonald’s own tap water rather than a coke?

CUSTOMER: Might as well go the whole hog. So to speak.

CASHIER: Excellent decision. That’s another 90p. It’s a pleasure serving a discerning customer such as yourself. That’s £9.35, please. Is that cash ore card?

(CUSTOMER is served with a slice of tomato and a small paper cup of water.)

CASHIER: Enjoy. And have a nice day, Next!

(FX OFF: Cash register ‘kerching’)

Ref: BBC News Restaurants urged to serve us less food

What’s the biggest rip-off restaurant you’ve been ripped off in?
What job have you been most over-qualified for?
Leave a Comment below

You are awesome for sharing

Click Here to Leave a Comment Below

Leave a Reply: