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4, March 2019

Man arrested for throwing an egg at Jeremy Corbyn. Police scrambled to catch him but finally whisked him away

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Jeremy Corbyn was not eggspecting an egg. "I ordered pizza and chips," he said

Jeremy Corbyn was not eggspecting an egg. “I ordered pizza and chips,” he said

A Metropolitan police deteggtive said: “An egg was thrown at a Member of Parliament. We are eggsamining the crime scene and have taken a male suspect into custardy. The seriousness of the offence cannot be eggsaggerated.”

The man was reported to be a hard-boiled, eggs-con who’d done time for poaching – about 3 minutes.

He cracked up under intereggation and said he was egged on by the crowd. He confessed to battery but cried “fowl”. The police denied beating him and said it was a poultry eggscuse. All bystanders had been eggsonerated. Later, they said his confession had been mislaid but they are eggspecting a resolution soon and he was likely to be cooped up for a long time.

Several celebrities tweeted their support for the Labour leader including Egg Sheeran, Megg Ryan, Yolko Ono and Scarlett Yolkhansson.

Mr Corbyn said he was eggstremely grateful. He added: “It was a rotten eggsperience but it’s been a long day and I’m egghausted. The man is obviously de-ranged so omlettin’ this go.”

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