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30, October 2019

Commons run by cleaners after mass MP corruption scandal

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The cleaning staff tidy up the House of Commons after another hard debate about lowering MP's salary

The cleaning staff tidy up the House of Commons after another hard debate about lowering MP’s salary

During the acrimonious events of the last three years, every MP in the House of Commons has had allegations of one sort or another made against them.

These include allegations of pigeon fancying, dog trafficking, cat walking, sheep harassment, saying “boo” to a goose, fishing for compliments, rudeness, lateness, failing to wear trousers, eating the last éclair, being nice to a solicitor, gerrymandering, pettifogging, and telling fibs.

The last complaint had to be quashed as it is actually written into the job description but all MPs fell foul of other misdemeanours so the charge was left in.

For most, it was just another day in the life of an MP.

However, the complaints were investigated by the Commons standards commission. As a result, every MP was found in breach of Commons standards, breaking the law, wasting time, being a twat or making a mess in the toilets.

The ruling forced every MP to resign including the members of the standards committee.

Parliament is being run by the cleaning staff who passed a bill to increase minimum wage to £127.53 per hour and reduce MP’s salary to £2.71 per month.

It is expected that this will deter all new potential MP candidates apart from those with a lust for power, position and willing to take a backhander.

Normal service will be resumed after the next election.

Ref: BBC News Labour MP Keith Vaz faces six-month suspension after drug and sex probe


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