To mark April Fools’ Day, in Hungary hundreds of people took part in a “silly walks” parade. In the UK, millions of people watched fools cocking up another Brexit vote!

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

Stan Lee lives! Doctors say: “It’s a Marvel!”

James Corden whinges and complains’chubby’ actors are shut out of romantic roles. #MeTooFat

Gollum diagnosed with shiny object syndrome

Nigerian Presidential elections halted in last-minute drama – someone actually replied to the Prince’s Nigerian scan email!

Killer car seats have been sold online for £8. Tennessee is considering them as alterantive to the electric chair

Paedophile ring smashed – Pied Piper arrested

“Walls work!” says Donald Trump. “Mine doesn’t!” said Bobby “Bubba” Brandon of Texan. “It doesn’t even keep out the damn Mexican kids next door!”

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos agrees $35bn divorce settlement. His affair with Fox TV host Lauren Sánchez officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the most expensive f*@k in history!

The world’s first AI politician can sidestep questions on any issue from policing to climate change, and poverty to taxation. However, the developers have so far been unable to incorporate the essential lying, expense-fiddling and back-stabbing routines

Corruption allegations made against Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. “It’s anti-semitic!” he claims. #Anti-semitismFail

Trump’s “witch hunt” successful! 27 witches arrested. Salem on lockdown

During her visit to China UK PM, Thereas May, said she wanted to “intensify the golden era of UK/China relations”. Bejing said if that’s what she wanted, they were quite ready for another Boxer Rebellion

Saturday Night Live Improv star arrested in bizzare recipe squabble. A police spokesman said: “You couldn’t make it up!”

Facebook data leak accidentally reveals identity of the unknown soldier

Thousands of criminals to be tracked by GPS. “And if that works,” said a UK government spokesperson. “We’ll be rolling it out as compulsory for everyone else.”

Category Archives for "Science & Technology"

Nag! Nag! Nag! “It’s just like being at home,” says Japanese businessman

You don't need a geisha with a Nag-o-Matic

Enterprising Japanese tech company, Nagumatikku, was demonstrating its latest innovation at the AI Expo in Japan. The pocket-size device whose name, Jitaku de chīsana on’na, roughly translates as “Little woman at home” has been developed for travelling businessmen who feel lonely staying in hotels and who do not want the services of a geisha. The […]

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Weird hairstyle reveals North Korean Kim Jong-un as a dictator

Kim Jong-un's weird hair definitely marks him as a dictator!

Dr Gwendoline Bendover, psychological profiler has made a study of criminals with weird hairstyles. An analysis of the hairstyle of North Korea’s Kim Jong-un has revealed him as a dictator. “Hairstyle is one thing you can’t hide,” said Dr Bendover. “At least not unless you shave it off. You can see that Kim has tried […]

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Dogs will rule the world by 2050 as they get smarter and humans get dumber!

Dogs will rule the world by 2050!

Esteemed psychologist and dog behaviourist, Dr Stanley Coren PhD., DSc, FRSC, who specialises in testing dogs’ IQ, says that dogs are definitely getting smarter. When he first began his doggy IQ tests back in the 1990s, dogs were as smart as the average two-year old. “Now,” says Dr Coren. “Dogs are as smart as a […]

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Oil companies release “Energy from water” patents they’ve sat on for years! “It’s a major boon for the whole world,” they say. “But mainly for us!”

Gives a new meaning to the phrase:

In a joint statement put out by the World’s five biggest oil companies, they have agreed to release “energy from water” patents that they have held for over 50 years. The patents describe how water can be converted to energy and used to “fuel” every kind of engine from cars to planes, and from boats […]

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21, February 2019

Medical breakthrough of the century! “Eating causes tooth decay,” say Dentists

In a medical breakthrough claimed to be the most important health discovery of the century, dentists have revealed that tooth decay is caused by eating food with your teeth. Dr “Painless” Peter Potter of the Dental Research Institute of Philadelphia said a 17-year study into the causes of tooth decay showed that putting food in […]

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17, February 2019

Dog with the rudest name in the world is Shih Tzu! – says Guinness Book of Records

We love this little Shitty Ass Fokker

A Shih Tzu dog called Shitty Ass has been named the dog with the rudest name in the world by the Guinness Book of Records. It’s official! The dog’s owners, Buck and Bella-Ellen Fokker from Arkansas said: “We didn’t know nothing about it. Our good neighbour sent the name to the Guinness Book of Records […]

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12, February 2019

Beer and wine myth exposed! “You’ll still feel like shite the next morning,” say scientists.

The saying “Beer before wine make you feel fine, wine before beer makes you feel queer,” has been shown to be “pure balderdash” say German scientists. In a study involving the country’s entire student population, half were told to drink six pints of lager followed by two bottles of white wine. The other half drank […]

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