Facebook data leak accidentally reveals identity of the unknown soldier

Corruption allegations made against Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. “It’s anti-semitic!” he claims. #Anti-semitismFail

Nigerian Presidential elections halted in last-minute drama – someone actually replied to the Prince’s Nigerian scan email!

Saturday Night Live Improv star arrested in bizzare recipe squabble. A police spokesman said: “You couldn’t make it up!”

Thousands of criminals to be tracked by GPS. “And if that works,” said a UK government spokesperson. “We’ll be rolling it out as compulsory for everyone else.”

Killer car seats have been sold online for £8. Tennessee is considering them as alterantive to the electric chair

To mark April Fools’ Day, in Hungary hundreds of people took part in a “silly walks” parade. In the UK, millions of people watched fools cocking up another Brexit vote!

Paedophile ring smashed – Pied Piper arrested

“Walls work!” says Donald Trump. “Mine doesn’t!” said Bobby “Bubba” Brandon of Texan. “It doesn’t even keep out the damn Mexican kids next door!”

The world’s first AI politician can sidestep questions on any issue from policing to climate change, and poverty to taxation. However, the developers have so far been unable to incorporate the essential lying, expense-fiddling and back-stabbing routines

Trump’s “witch hunt” successful! 27 witches arrested. Salem on lockdown

During her visit to China UK PM, Thereas May, said she wanted to “intensify the golden era of UK/China relations”. Bejing said if that’s what she wanted, they were quite ready for another Boxer Rebellion

James Corden whinges and complains’chubby’ actors are shut out of romantic roles. #MeTooFat

Gollum diagnosed with shiny object syndrome

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

Stan Lee lives! Doctors say: “It’s a Marvel!”

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos agrees $35bn divorce settlement. His affair with Fox TV host Lauren Sánchez officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the most expensive f*@k in history!

Category Archives for "Politics"

BBC cancels News programs after man interviewed in road accident dies

BBC cancels its News programs after death of interviewee. Where the heck will we go now for our unbiased news?

The BBC has cancelled all its news programs after revising its broadcasting guidelines. We spoke to a BBC spokeswoman because she was far cheaper than a spokesman. She told us that the decision revolved around a story in which a man in a road traffic accident was interviewed and confessed to drinking and driving. He […]

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Dogs unhappy about humans dying out and leaving the planet in such a f*cking mess

Zak watches as we cut down another forest forcing a hundred thousand animal and plant species into extinction, and wonders where he's going to bury his bones now

As dog IQ increases and human IQ decreases, dogs are still set to take over the world by 2050. However, by that time humans will have so fucked-up the planet that there won’t be much left for the dogs to take over. Zak is a 4-year old Border Collie, currently reckoned to be the smartest […]

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Climate change, bio extinction. – it’s too late. We’re f*cked. Don’t have any more babies warns UN

Look upon your works - and party like there's no tomorrow. Because there's not

The inevitable catastrophe of climate change has been compounded by a UN report revealing that humans are killing over one million animal and plant species. That’s over a quarter of life on the planet, excluding humans, of course, and the inhabitants of America. The world population has doubled since 1970, due to low-quality condoms, child […]

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Government solves Welsh mountain queue problems by making them hills

Mount Snowdon is now Hill Snowdon. The Welsh will no longer be plagued by hoards of tourists who will now be shuffled off to Scotland

The influx of tourist to Wales’ mountains has revealed severe problems for visitors. There is a shortage of parking, toilets, refreshment facilities, and too many locals are speaking in a Welsh accent. The popularity of beauty spots such as Snowdon and Pen y Fan is because they are beauty spots. And mountains. At 1085m Snowdon […]

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Game of Thrones responsible for drop in life expectancy

Is Game of Thrones shortening your life?

According to the Actuarial Social Society, the life expectancy of UK citizens has dropped dramatically over the past two years. A spokesperson said: “It’s a combination of poor nutrition, money worries and waiting for the next episode of Game of Thrones. “Plus, people are no longer eating an apple a day as their parent and […]

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