Category Archives for "Politics"
Mark Carney, current Governor of the Bank of England, at least until January, has given the UK economy a massive boost by predicting a vast rise in absolutely everything over the next two years. The previous forecast of only a small rise in the UK economy has been upgraded to a massive 12.5% which is […]Tell me more...!
Every PM needs a bunch of advisers. The UK’s new PM, Boris Johnson, has assembled a gaggle of farmyard animals to help him make important policy decisions about running the UK. Mr Johnson said: “The wisdom of animals is severely underrated and I am determined not to make the same mistakes as my predecessors who […]Tell me more...!
A Professor of English at one of America’s most prestigious universities has been sacked after admitting that he wrote US President Donald Trump‘s speeches. Professor J. A. Cedric Klaussmann of Stanford University which runs one of America’s top graduate English programs, was fired after confessing he wrote Donald Trump‘s speeches. “I had an inner compulsion […]Tell me more...!
Feature by guest reporter David Layzelle Recently installed Leader of the House, Jacob Rees-Mogg, Esq., has cemented his position as an authoritarian by issuing a list of preferred words to be used in Parliament. He creates a dashing figure dressed in his customary frock coat over a white starched wing-collar shirt set off by an […]Tell me more...!
One of the first acts of Boris Johnson, the UK’s new Prime Minister, has been to order the creation of a new PM bodyguard unit. The unit will consist of over 20,000 men and women, hand-picked from the armed forces, the police service and up-market hairdressers. Their role will be to shield the PM from […]Tell me more...!
In a leaked memo, it’s been revealed that Universities are adding a new secret test to all student applications. The Chancellor of a University he did not want to be named said: “While we happily accept all students regardless of race, sexual orientation or economic background, we cannot compromise on intellectual ability, common sense or […]Tell me more...!
In an unprecedented reversal of typical university applications, students in their thousands have been switching from political degrees to sign up for Clown School. Clown impresario and spokesman for the Family Of Clowns Association, Professor Bongo Baggy Britches, said: “Clowning has been a dying profession but it has got a new lease of life today. […]Tell me more...!
Pioneering technology which links the brain to computers and AI (Artificial Intelligence) systems has been developed and tested on dogs. As the technology advances dogs could be set to take over the world by 2030 rather than 2050 as originally assumed. The first pioneer is Bella, a Border Collie and the sister of Zak who […]Tell me more...!