Movie business to make a movie about the business of making a movie in the movie business

Government passes Deferred Gratification bill. It comes into effect in 2050

James Pattison to stop collaborating with co-authors. His next solo book is due out in2035

Catalytic converters stolen for precious metals. Police search for culprits was exhautive… But plans to prosecute dealers receiving the metal have been scrapped

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

Donald Trump urges Europe to repatriate IS fighters – and shoot them!

Remake of Hitchcock’s The Birds being backed by vulture capitalists

Narcissus updates Faccebook relationship status to “Me”. Zuckerberg updates his status to “God”

How to spot a fashion rip-off – the original garment costs ten times what it’s worth!

A vandal broke into the Tate Gallery and made up Tracy Emin’s “My Bed”. Police are looking for a criminal who’s had a good night’s sleep

Birmingham bin workers strike over ‘poor equipment’ claims. A council spokesman said: “That’s absolute rubbish!”

You CAN die laughing – although not at a Michael McIntye show

Turner Old Master found in rubble: Ex-teacher Brian Turner doing well after his ordeal

Hotel California – guests check out and leave! One said: “The pink champagne was a nice surprise and the band was good but the guitar solo did go on a bit…”

Thieves broke into Battersea Dogs Home. No animals were taken but police are looking for leads. A spokesman for Battersea said: “They’re barking up the wrong tree.”

Government crackdown on unregistered protests has lead to an increase in unregistered protests

Prolific Facebook “Liker” Simon Miles ordered to stop Liking everything – he doesn’t Like it.

In a bid to tackle herd mentality, Facebook bans mental patients with hearing difficulties

“Salsa is supposed to keep you fit,” said Roscoe Arbuckle. “But I ate 5 bottles a day and I haven’t lost an ounce!”

“All music copyright to be assigned to monkeys,” says EU

You are awesome for sharing

Nah, don't bother, mate. Monkeys have already written millions of songs ten times better than that

Nah, don’t bother, mate. Monkeys have already written millions of songs ten times better than that

The last few years have seen a massive increase in the number of publishers suing songwriters for ‘copying’ music.

It’s a far easier way to make money than writing new songs, although much modern music is derivative drivel and the songwriters ought be sued for inflicting it on the public.

Songwriters are reluctant to release new material for fear of being sued so the EU took time off from humiliating the UK to investigate. It has proposed a new Music Copyright Law.

Renowned musicologist Dr J.D. Spiegelman has made an exhaustive study of western music from the early days of the Pan Flute.

He explains: “There are only 12 notes in the scale. Although the ways of combining them are vast, they are not infinite so it is inevitable that some pieces of music will sound similar.

“If you put a lot of monkeys with musical instruments in a room, eventually they would produce every possible piece of music. Some wouldn’t sound terribly good but that’s not the point.

“Music, therefore, should not be subject to the same copyright laws as other intellectual property because all music already exists. If you must assign it copyright, give it to the monkeys.”

A spokesperson for the Music Publishers Association said: “He doesn’t know his A♭ from his elbow. Monkeys couldn’t write Justin Bieber songs. Well, maybe they could but that’s not the point.

“Besides, how are we supposed to survive if we can’t sue people? We’d have to sell our yachts and our lawyers would have to go back to chasing ambulances.”

Whipsnade Zoo recently placed an order for a dozen pianos. A spokesperson said: “It’s a start.

Ref: BBC Newss Ryan Tedder slams ‘ludicrous’ copyright cases

Which is the most over-rated song you know?
Should we be able to copyright farts?
Leave a Comment below

You are awesome for sharing

Click Here to Leave a Comment Below

Leave a Reply: