During her visit to China UK PM, Theresa May, said she wanted to “intensify the golden era of UK/China relations”. Bejing said if that’s what she wanted, they were quite ready for another Boxer Rebellion

Saturday Night Live Improv star arrested in bizzare recipe squabble. A police spokesman said: “You couldn’t make it up!”

Paedophile ring smashed – Pied Piper arrested

“Walls work!” says Donald Trump. “Mine doesn’t!” said Bobby “Bubba” Brandon of Texas. “It doesn’t even keep out the damn Mexican kids next door!”

Stan Lee lives! Doctors say: “It’s a Marvel!”

Gollum diagnosed with shiny object syndrome

Corruption allegations made against Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. “It’s anti-semitic!” he claims. #Anti-semitismFail

The world’s first AI politician can sidestep questions on any issue from policing to climate change, and poverty to taxation. However, the developers have so far been unable to incorporate the essential lying, expense-fiddling and back-stabbing routines

Trump’s “witch hunt” successful! 27 witches arrested. Salem on lockdown

Killer car seats have been sold online for £8. Tennessee is considering them as alterantive to the electric chair

Facebook data leak accidentally reveals identity of the unknown soldier

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos agrees $35bn divorce settlement. His affair with Fox TV host Lauren Sánchez officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the most expensive f*@k in history!

Thousands of criminals to be tracked by GPS. “And if that works,” said a UK government spokesperson. “We’ll be rolling it out as compulsory for everyone else.”

James Corden whinges and complains’chubby’ actors are shut out of romantic roles. #MeTooFat

To mark April Fools’ Day, in Hungary hundreds of people took part in a “silly walks” parade. In the UK, millions of people watched fools cocking up another Brexit vote!

Cost of burials and cremations has risen sharply – Ofcom accuses funeral directors of taking dead people for a ride

Nigerian Presidential elections halted in last-minute drama – someone actually replied to the Prince’s Nigerian scan email!

“All music copyright to be assigned to monkeys,” says EU

You are awesome for sharing

Nah, don't bother, mate. Monkeys have already written millions of songs ten times better than that

Nah, don’t bother, mate. Monkeys have already written millions of songs ten times better than that

The last few years have seen a massive increase in the number of publishers suing songwriters for ‘copying’ music.

It’s a far easier way to make money than writing new songs, although much modern music is derivative drivel and the songwriters ought be sued for inflicting it on the public.

Songwriters are reluctant to release new material for fear of being sued so the EU took time off from humiliating the UK to investigate. It has proposed a new Music Copyright Law.

Renowned musicologist Dr J.D. Spiegelman has made an exhaustive study of western music from the early days of the Pan Flute.

He explains: “There are only 12 notes in the scale. Although the ways of combining them are vast, they are not infinite so it is inevitable that some pieces of music will sound similar.

“If you put a lot of monkeys with musical instruments in a room, eventually they would produce every possible piece of music. Some wouldn’t sound terribly good but that’s not the point.

“Music, therefore, should not be subject to the same copyright laws as other intellectual property because all music already exists. If you must assign it copyright, give it to the monkeys.”

A spokesperson for the Music Publishers Association said: “He doesn’t know his A♭ from his elbow. Monkeys couldn’t write Justin Bieber songs. Well, maybe they could but that’s not the point.

“Besides, how are we supposed to survive if we can’t sue people? We’d have to sell our yachts and our lawyers would have to go back to chasing ambulances.”

Whipsnade Zoo recently placed an order for a dozen pianos. A spokesperson said: “It’s a start.

Ref: BBC Newss Ryan Tedder slams ‘ludicrous’ copyright cases

Which is the most over-rated song you know?
Should we be able to copyright farts?
Leave a Comment below

You are awesome for sharing

Click Here to Leave a Comment Below

Leave a Reply: