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30, May 2019

Alastair Campbell expelled from Labour for not eating Trifle

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Labour Trifle - you don't have to eat it, but you do have to pretend to like it

Labour Trifle – you don’t have to eat it, but you do have to pretend to like it

Tony Blair’s spin doctor, policy maker and pasty cook, Alastair Campbell, has been expelled from the Labour party for complaining that the Labour Trifle is squelchy unappetising gunge, and confessing that he preferred other puddings.

That’s the Labour party’s wonderful rule – you don’t have to like the Trifle but if you tell everyone you prefer Eton Mess with ice cream, you’re out.

You are allowed to eat other puds as long as you’re not a silly arse and tell anyone.

Unless you want to annoy the cook and get some publicity. Oh yes, that’s what Campbell was good at. Back in the day.

So Campbell ‘the spin’, who most people have forgotten about, decided this was a good way to revive interest in his flagging popularity.

If he’d kept his spin doctor mouth shut he’d still be skulking in anonymous Labour corridors and languishing in obscurity.

But that wouldn’t cause other Labour members to stand up and shout: “No! I am Alastair Campbell,” and also confess a preference for other desserts.

When Campbell was spinning tall tales for Tony bLiar Blair, the truth was the farthest thing from his mind. He knew a Jam Rolly Polly from an Upside Down Orange Cake. But now, who knows who’s been eating what?

The appeal of the Labour Whack-A-Mole Trifle seems to have worn off. Time to seek a more palatable pudding?

Ref: BBC News ‘I’m not a Lib Dem, says Alastair Campbell after Labour expulsion

Does anyone remember Alastair Campbell?
What was worse – he wrote Tony Blair’s lies or he prefers Eton Mess to Trifle?
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